Issues at New Life
It is with some pain that I have heard about the difficulties back at New Life at the moment. Troubles in churches are always difficult, trouble in your home church, when you are a long way away, are very difficult to deal with.
I have no way of knowing what the issues are or to form any firm opinion on them, but what I do wish to see is normal business resumed as quickly as possible and issues dealt with in the right way, by the proper authorities.
However we do care about our church, we have opinions, church is something that matters deeply to us? We want to fix things, make everything alright, understand everything that is going on, sometimes that is just not possible.
As we look at how we react and interact around this time, we need to be careful in how we interact with each other, what we say and how we say it- so that we do not create new problems, nor damage the chances of resolution being brought to existing problems. A few useful scriptures spring to mind:
Submit to one another out of reverence to Christ – Ephesians 5:21
Our goal ought not to be to fight our corner, but actually to submit to one another. Does this mean that we should never hold a contrary position or give an opinion? I don’t think so, but it does mean that if we do so it is for the good of others as much as for the good of ourselves. If your concern is for your agenda, your rights, your way, put it down and examine what you can do or say that would bring most benefit to the people round you.
Bear with each other – Colossians 3:13
I love the practical nature of this scripture, it assumes we are imperfect and need bearing with. None of us are perfect and we all do things that cause others to struggle with us at times, even me , and the scripture encourages us at times just to ‘suck it up’ and love each other despite our grievances.
Some offences are not even worth mentioning- you just need to let them go, and hope that other people do the same with yours. In other instances, issues are important enough to mention, but then the issue is the issue not the person. We should have the grace to hold a differing opinion and treat other parties with love and respect- believing that even though our views may differ, the other person is doing their best to hear God in the situation, is acting in good faith and working things through as they know best. It is too easy to demonise both people and their motives when they hold differing opinions and give offence to us.
Forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another– Colossians 3:13
When it does get too much and we do take offence, stop and forgive. This doesn’t mean forgive and seek reconciliation when you are only in the wrong. It means forgive even when you feel yourself to be in the right and have ground to stand. Often being right in the wrong way does more damage than being wrong in the right way. Attitude counts for an awful lot.
How does this translate to how we conduct ourselves at this time?
I would suggest the following practical steps:
Listen More
God gave us two ears and one mouth. It is our tendency to want to tell the world what we think, or what we think we think, or what we don’t know but want to say anyway. We need to stop and listen to God, listen to our brothers and sister, submit to them and put their preferences and needs above our own.
Listen to Peoples hearts.
So often we are caught up in issues, opinions and facts when we really need to be listening to peoples’ emotions, desires and aspirations. I do not know the facts of this situation- I may never do. But I do know the heart of the trustees and the elders is to serve the church to the best of their ability and knowledge. In absence of other things we need to listen to peoples’ hearts.
Talk Less
I will freely admit I am preaching to myself here. In the war, the phrase was used ‘careless talk costs lives’, I don’t think the issue is as serious here, but the principle remains: talking about things we don’t know about, or things that we half know about can cause discontent, undue arguments, stir people up and cause grief- leading to discord and unsubstantiated allegations being thrown.
In politics the phrase is used, ‘Those who know don’t talk, and those who talk don’t know.’ There is much truth to it. We all like to speak and be heard even when we have little that is constructive to say. Restraint here is hard, but I believe it is invaluable to helping people get this resolved.
Please don’t attack people, insinuate motives, send fiery emails or other ways inflame the situation.
Be Patient with the Process
We are an instant generation; we wish to see things fixed yesterday. A process is underway and showing the Christian virtue of patience is the best way forward to seeing the right solution come.
Ands finally in all things love. Look forward to seeing you all very soon.
Jon
